I got to hang out in Newport Beach for a little bit yesterday. It was fun.
Category: RESEARCH
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Apple Pie
“If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe.” – Carl Sagan
I love this quote. I had it on the first page in the first draft of my book. I decided for less text so it got denied.
I love it because I understand the idea of starting something very small and then growing it and growing it. Turning nothing into something. This is how Hamburger Eyes began and it is how everything I do begins.
I interpreted this quote as a belief that there is a natural staircase of steps to achieve something. This long and winding staircase assumes a large chunk of time will be needed. And I operated with this always in mind. I think I have extreme patience when it comes to creative endeavors. I think I have extreme optimism too, which sometimes works against me.
But now I’m thinking I was wrong. Depending on what you believe, the universe was created in an instant big bang or by God in 7 days. Either way, it didn’t take that long.
The idea that you have to spend a long time on something for it to work is a limiting belief is what I am trying to say. You can have success in an instant. You can have a delicious apple pie within 7 days. Recipes already exist, tweak them to your liking. No need to hurry, but no need to wait either.
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Non-Resistance
When we think about resistance, well me anyways, I think about “The Resistance” like all the rebel forces in the sci-fi movies. In fact I have stolen this line from Terminator 4, “If you are hearing this message, you are The Resistance.” I used it multiple times in product descriptions and email newsletters for Hamburger Eyes.
But when it comes to matters of the self, particularly creativity, resistance is the opposite of flow. I find myself battling upstream sometimes, getting tossed, struggling. I plan a certain project out all perfect, yet before I know it chaos occurs.
“What we resist, persists.” That’s a quote I heard recently. I think it means if I resist “problems” then I give those problems more power. I think maybe we have to incorporate the problems and go with the natural flow that will hopefully navigate us to somewhere proper.
Our GPS in this river then must be experience. So from there we could say the sooner we experience more things, the sooner we could navigate a little better. “But I don’t wanna die,” you might say.
Here’s a quote from Charles Barkley, “Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.” He commentates on NBA Basketball. He says this line a lot. He is talking about how everyone wants to win the championship, but no one wants to play defense. Somehow I think this applies here.
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EDITS
This is Ed Templeton signing copies of his new book at Arcana Books near my place in Culver City. This book store could probably place in the top 10 photo books stores in the world. They have everything. I love going there and browsing books and it’s always a treat when someone I know is doing an event there.
Looking at books it made me think about how different editing for books is versus editing for zines. And how different that is from editing for prints and how different that is from editing for blogs and how different that is from editing for social media. Each seems to have it’s own dialects, boundaries, and obstacles. I have written about this on the Hamburger Eyes site, but I think I will go in on it again.
This is Lee, the owner of Arcana Books. Maybe one day I can interview him and ask what makes a perfect photo book and if or if not that translates to sales.
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HARD COPY
This is a photo of Alex. He came over and bought some frames.
I’m on this thing where I think I should just be writing all the time even if it is not at all interesting to anyone. Just a heads up.
On the first of every month I dump everything on my phone into a folder on one of my hard drives. Also all my neg scans and other digital photos from that month go in there too. I have all these folders labeled by month and year.
I had a slight feeling of panic realizing that I don’t have back up for any of these drives. What if everything got deleted? I have already had it happen twice before. I think I need to make prints of everything. Yeah?
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Slow Lane
I drive like a Grandma. I think people who have driven with me kind of trip out on it. Here’s why, I have mostly been driving illegally since I started driving. My Dad would send me on errands since I was 14. I got a driving permit when I was 15 and that seemed good enough for everyone involved.
Eventually got my license at age 28 and didn’t always have insurance or registration on the cars I have owned. This is why I keep it so mellow. I use my turn signals and follow all the rules and try to keep a low profile. Now I am all proper with my paperwork, but my driving habits stayed the same.
I can’t say the same for my health. I have been having problems. Time to act like the health cops are ready to pull me over any minute for fucking up. Eating better, sleeping better, and exercising better. We all should. My body is achy like I just got a seatbelt ticket or some dumb shit.
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Frames
Thanks to everyone that bought prints! I have 100s of them and plan to update the store regularly so check back from time to time. I’ll remind you. I’m actually going to leave the discount code running for 24 more hours if you are feeling froggy.
Also if you need frames and live in Los Angeles, I got some for you. I have too many and they’re taking up too much space. These are from past exhibitions and are in mostly perfect shape. I have 100s of them in all sizes and shapes. I have started listing them on Craigslist. Let me know if you want some.
Thanks again!
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44
Probably the weirdest thing about being 44 is that it feels like it was just last year when I turned 40. Whole years recent years scrambled up what a trip. I am still feeling the shock, actually more like a stun, of turning 40.
Everyone that makes it on the news seems to either be a child or in their 40s. “Man robs bank, approx 5’10”, mid 40s.” Or on the other end, “Doctor discovers a new cure. PHD from Blah Blah Blah University. 2 kids, 44 years old”.
They say your 40s are your glory years. Is it because this is when you are supposed to do something so notable that you end up on the news? Either in maximum desperation or in genius level expression?
My older friends, multiple friends in different circles told me that I will get a “License To Not Give a Fuck” when I turn 40. I’m like uhhhh, I got mine a while ago. I been not giving a fuck.
But now that I’m a few years into it, I can see they were right. It really is like turning pro for not giving a fuck.
It sounds negative, like saying here’s a free pass to be an asshole or something. No, it’s different. It’s more like being certified to be yourself. I have accepted my criminality and I will attempt to rob this bank regardless if I get caught. Or, I have accepted my genius and will attempt to invent some new science regardless of existing data.
I have friends quitting their jobs and other friends getting pregnant, some are creating, some are destroying, some are chill mode deep, some are hyper attack mode. The difference at this age is it is all 100% guilt free. Wild caught free range organic.
I’m not saying free from responsibility, I think that’s impossible. I’m saying free from influence of others like parents, family, friends, society, and culture. Not because of stubbornness but because of certification of self.
Sure you can have these types of realizations at a younger age but I’m feeling lucky in life because some don’t have it ever. I think that’s the glory.
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Gratitude
More than once I have seen Gary V. chopping up a hypothetical situation and say something like, “.. And then that’s where I would deploy gratitude.” He is basically talking about weaponizing gratitude and at the precise strategical moment he will not hesitate to drop a gratitude bomb on your head.
I think it is an interesting way to talk about emotions. I mean we have all witnessed and maybe even executed an f-bomb or anger bomb. And then later, sometimes years later, we assess the damage done to ourselves and everyone within that blast zone radius.
It does sound like an over simplification to deploy an emotion at any time we want. There are scenarios where we just can’t control certain feelings. But when it comes to gratitude, I think it is different. I think we can drop a gratitude water balloon, gratitude grenade, or gratitude nuke whenever and wherever we want. Especially if we woke up that day.
Today is my bday. Feeling grateful. Every once in a while it lands right on top of Thanksgiving. This year it did so I’m feeling extra grateful. Thanks for reading this. Thanks for listening and looking and letting me be me. Love you.
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Pressure
I just watched Bohemian Rhapsody. It was awesome. I thought there would be a David Bowie character cameo for their song, “Under Pressure”. There wasn’t. In fact they didn’t use that song at all in the movie.
I been feeling the pressure lately. I think it’s always around the holidays. Like a reassessment of the past year. I think since I have been blogging and vlogging about self improvement that maybe I feel it even more. Shouldn’t I be further along at this point?
But I think that’s the point, questioning who what where and how is the point. You could argue down how much you really need to survive. You could argue against comparing today to your troubled past and potential future. These arguments are the boundaries of our minds. These boundaries are the problems we are supposed to solve.
A quote from Albert Einstein, “No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.”
With that being said, what we are looking for is expansion. If we are not growing, we are wilting like all things in nature. I think expansion comes from vulnerability. Withstand the elements, then live another season. Stronger. And fluffier.
Maybe we have to put down our weapons any purposely surrender to force an expansion. Like the plot from Deadpool and other X-Men origin stories, extreme pressure will manifest the X gene.
Another quote. This one from unknown author, “If you wanna make a omelet, you have to break a few eggs.”
